Why Jesus, Mary and Joseph would never have gotten into America

[captainsblog]

10) All three of obvious Middle Eastern descent.

9) Child born out of wedlock, and alleged father proven by DNA testing to be lying about it.

8) Previous history of undocumented border crossings.

7) Gold, frankincense and myrrh not declared to Customs officials.

6) No confirmed hotel reservations or other fixed address for stay in country.

5) Joseph carrying carpenters' tools without necessary green card.

4) Son known to consort with criminals and other bad influences.

3) Son completely resistive to attempts at waterboarding during initial interrogation.

2) Trace quantities of manure found on clothes.

And the number one reason the Holy Family would never have gotten past La Migra:

1) Uncanny resemblance to figures from banned Nativity Scenes.

Comments

[bluesilverkdg.livejournal.com]

Did you make those up? Very good!

And re number 6, I betcha they didn't even have a credit card. Terri can tell you about trying to get into a hotel without a credit card.

[captainsblog.livejournal.com]

Not only is the list mine, the underlying prejudice was:(

Driving home from a dental appointment yesterday (70 miles away, I should post about THAT whole story sometime, huh), the westbound 90 just seemed full of speed demons, who kept coming up on my ass, headlights on and sometimes flashing, and when I got out of their way I noticed that several of them were (a) from either downstate New York (which, despite having license plates the same as ours- we don't list counties on them- you could still tell from the names of car dealerships on the back) or New Jersey, and (b) being driven by guys appearing to be of Arab descent.

I found myself grumbling about these obnoxious drivers, and speculating under my breath about whether they were speeding to B-lo to blow up the Peace Bridge or something. I caught myself, though, and ridiculed myself for expressing such anti-Arabic prejudice (the anti-New Jersey prejudice, on the other hand, being completely justified). That led to my thinking, "sheesh, Jesus Mary and Joseph probably would've been suspected of being terrorists," and, well, you have the rest.

[headbanger118.livejournal.com]

Yes it would BEHOOVE you to take the actual credit card to the hotel.

[headbanger118.livejournal.com]

I particulary like number 1.