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Dear Tiger,

Thank you SO much for picking today for your mea culpa. It totally took the radical Teabagger pilot out of the news cycle, so we can't be blamed for fomenting such anti-gummint terrorism.

Yours,
The Tea Party Movement

----

Dear Fans:

The sex therapy clinic looks. Good, my apology feels. Good, I like. My, chances.

Sincerely,
Eldrick

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Dear Senators,

We won. Get over it. The public option will save billions of dollars a year in Medicare, Medicaid and other current expenses. That makes it a candidate for reconciliation, which will get Congress past the insurmountable 60-vote hurdle that has led to redonkulous Senate-bill deals for Nebraska, Arkansas and other bribe-taking senators' home states.

Your constituents should check this list. If either of their Senators is not yet on it (both of mine are), they should fill in the blanks to contact you and find out why. Even some generally good progressives, like Minnesota's senior senator Amy Klobuchar, are waffling on joining the crowd supporting this movement. Calls from your intelligent and budget-conscious constituents might get the current number of 19 Senators up to 51, which is where we need to be.

Go team,
Ray

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Dear Canada,

We beat Switzerland handily. You needed to go deep into a shootoot to do the same. Be very afraid.

Peace-bridgey regards,
Your neighbors (and that's how it's spelled) who are gonna kick your ass.

----

{S goodbye

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