What do you say to a naked lady?
Aug. 4th, 2009 05:24 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
captainsblogThat's not anything close to what your evil twisted little mind (or mine, for that matter) would normally think it's about. (There is a truly obscure pop-culture reference in the header, points for which will be awarded to anyone who remembers what it is. Hint: it'll make me smile if you get it.)
Alas, this nakedidity only refers to the part of the female anatomy above the ears.
There are a few dozen regular to semi-regulars who I often see at the gym. I tend to go during a couple of afternoon weekday windows, and the same usual suspects tend to be there, too. A few, I know by name, others by their distinguishing shirts or hairstyles (such as the guy about my age who usually wears a MIAMI t-shirt which comes out in the mirrors as I MAIM).
Then there's this girl. She keeps to herself, goes about her business without seeming overly intense or coming across as eww-those-weight-things foofy, and usually has herself isolated into the same iPod People hole that I tend to occupy. The closest I ever came to striking up a conversation was after the latest Marshawn Lynch debacle broke out earlier this year and she was continuing to wear his Bills jersey. It's a touchy subject among some fans, so I took a pass on the topic.
Over time, though, I noticed that she was tending more toward wearing bandanas, and then always wearing one, and on at least one particular day I noticed a pretty serious swath of missing hair sticking out (such as that sticks out) under the ragtop. I suspected where this was going, and today, I saw her for the first time in probably a couple of months, completely bald.
My soft and mushy side immediately thought about saying something to her- wishing her well in her recovery, admiring her spirit at keeping up her workouts, asking what the prognosis was. But as touchy as I found bringing up a football player with her lo those months ago, getting this personal about something so obvious and yet so personally painful was even harder to do.
I'm not going to reduce this to the impersonality of a poll, but I do wonder about your thoughts. If it were you, and I hope it never is, would a kind word from a perfect, if vaguely familiar, stranger come across as comforting or creepy? And if you would say something, what would you? Finally, do the differences in gender (duh) and age (I'd guess she's late 20s) make a difference in what you'd suggest I do?
I don't even know her name, but I hope that spreading her story somehow brings some good karma to her. You guys rock at that.
Alas, this nakedidity only refers to the part of the female anatomy above the ears.
There are a few dozen regular to semi-regulars who I often see at the gym. I tend to go during a couple of afternoon weekday windows, and the same usual suspects tend to be there, too. A few, I know by name, others by their distinguishing shirts or hairstyles (such as the guy about my age who usually wears a MIAMI t-shirt which comes out in the mirrors as I MAIM).
Then there's this girl. She keeps to herself, goes about her business without seeming overly intense or coming across as eww-those-weight-things foofy, and usually has herself isolated into the same iPod People hole that I tend to occupy. The closest I ever came to striking up a conversation was after the latest Marshawn Lynch debacle broke out earlier this year and she was continuing to wear his Bills jersey. It's a touchy subject among some fans, so I took a pass on the topic.
Over time, though, I noticed that she was tending more toward wearing bandanas, and then always wearing one, and on at least one particular day I noticed a pretty serious swath of missing hair sticking out (such as that sticks out) under the ragtop. I suspected where this was going, and today, I saw her for the first time in probably a couple of months, completely bald.
My soft and mushy side immediately thought about saying something to her- wishing her well in her recovery, admiring her spirit at keeping up her workouts, asking what the prognosis was. But as touchy as I found bringing up a football player with her lo those months ago, getting this personal about something so obvious and yet so personally painful was even harder to do.
I'm not going to reduce this to the impersonality of a poll, but I do wonder about your thoughts. If it were you, and I hope it never is, would a kind word from a perfect, if vaguely familiar, stranger come across as comforting or creepy? And if you would say something, what would you? Finally, do the differences in gender (duh) and age (I'd guess she's late 20s) make a difference in what you'd suggest I do?
I don't even know her name, but I hope that spreading her story somehow brings some good karma to her. You guys rock at that.
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no subject
Date: 2009-08-04 09:42 pm (UTC)I suggest something like "I hope you're doing well" or what you said about admiring her continuing to work out. People with cancer are often ostracized simply because other folks don't know what to say. Even a nod and a hello are normal, human things. Anyone dealing with long-term illness needs every normal, human thing they can get.
no subject
Date: 2009-08-04 09:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-04 10:02 pm (UTC)I'm not sure. I'm more of the "get to know her, feel out the situation, and then if she seems receptive to talking about it, say something" mind. Wishing her well or seeing how she's doing as the first real conversation in a while might be a bit much, especially if she doesn't really want to talk about it. That truly is a touchy subject, but I'm sure you will handle it with grace, however you go about it.
Your title
Date: 2009-08-04 10:23 pm (UTC)Re: Your title
Date: 2009-08-04 11:23 pm (UTC)