Since the standoff is finally over,...
Apr. 12th, 2009 04:24 pm... and since it's a good five months until the real official one, I hereby proclaim next Sunday, April 19th as
INTERNATIONAL TALK LIKE A SOMALI PIRATE DAY!
"Avast thar, ye American flag-flyin' posers! Arr! We're takin yer vessel and claim all yer booty fer ransom!"
----
(several hours later:)
"Erm, Cap'n Jack?"
"Yes, malarkey?"
"They're not sposed to be fighting back, are they? Thems French and Arabs didn't fight back now."
----
(following the retreat to the lifeboat with the single hostage:)
"Arr, arr, that'll teach yas! We'll hang yer cap'n from the highest yardarm!"
"Cap'n Jack, sir?"
"Yes, malarkey?"
"It's a lifeboat. It hasn't GOT a yardarm."
"That's mutiny talk, matey! I command ye to walk the plank!"
"Cap'n Jack, sir?"
"Yes, malarkey?"
"It's a lifeboat. It hasn't...."
"ARRRRRR, shut up already!"
----
(The pirates engage the USS Bainbridge):
"Stand and deliver! We're the fiercest band of pirates ever to roam the Somali coast!"
"::koff:: You look like the fiercest band we've seen since they covered 'In the Navy' on the Muppet Show!"
----
(After a few more days go by on the lifeboat:)
"Still no sign of the ransom, Cap'n Jack! How long is it?"
"That's rather personal."
----
(At last the SEALs show up to put these idiots out of their misery:)
"Arr! What's that hostage doing going over the side again?"
"Swimming!"
"I can SEE that!"
"Cap'n Jack, sir?"
"Yes, malarkey?"
"Can you see those BULLETS, too?"
Arr Aye Pee, asspiratehats.
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Date: 2009-04-12 08:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-12 08:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-12 09:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-13 01:29 am (UTC)