Good thing we're all hooked on Heroes- cause we sure need some new ones....

[captainsblog]

Let's count off the role models we've lost recently. At the rate this news is going, I'm going to check the apple pie for cyanide.

Mom. So your misfit kid got teased in middle school. So he's a loner with a MySpace page honoring the perps of the Columbine massacre (let's cross Rupert Murdoch off the role model list, too, unless he was just trying to be Fair and Balanced™ on his social networking site). Mommie Dearest decides to take him out and home-school him. Good choice. However, she also decides that, hey, all kids should have a hobby, so she....

buys him two rifles and a handgun and allows him to accumulate a cache of weapons and explosives in her house?!?

Even worse: Was this Waco? A shack in Montana? No, it was suburban blue-state Philadelphia.

----

U.S. Senators. The news of Larry Craig's suspicious activity isn't new, but this week we found that he'd put a few more inches onto his already most famous body part: his nose.

The first growth came when we found out he studied syllogisms at some point. He'd told us previously, "If the judge allows me to withdraw my guilty plea, then I won't resign." The judge decisively refused to allow it. Does that mean that he will resign? Of course not.

Just as well, though; it allows shows like Wait Wait to keep him in the public (sp?) eye with items like this. If there's any credibility left in Larry's "I'm not gay" assertion, then click above and read the full recipe he sent in to a government collection entitled "Congress Cooks!"--

Super Tuber is a great snack that uses one of my favorite vegetables: The Idaho Potato. Of course, I suppose any type of potato could be used, but I cannot guarantee that a Super Tuber made with anything but a true Idaho potato would taste as good. Sincerely, Larry E. Craig, United States Senator

Ingredients
    1 hot dog, cook's choice
    1 Idaho baking potato, 7 to 10 ounces
    Mustard for dipping, any style
    Other condiments as desired such as cheese sauce, sour cream, chili, chives, bacon pieces or black olives.

Wash and dry potato. Rub with shortening or butter. With an apple corer or small knife, core out the potato center (end to end). Push hot dog through the center. Bake until potato is cooked through.

To Microwave: Place on microwave safe plate; cover loosely (to avoid splatters). Microwave on high about 4 minutes per potato until fork tender.

Unclear is whether you are supposed to push the hot dog into the moist, waiting potato only once or pound it in mercilessly several times. Particularly when you consider that our British friends refer to the mix of this meat and this vegetable as "bangers and mash."

----

The police.  To protect and serve sue:

CASSELBERRY, Fla. — A police officer who slipped and injured a knee during a rescue call has sued the family who phoned 911 after their 1-year-old boy nearly drowned.

The child, Joey Cosmillo, fell into the family pool in January. He was resuscitated but suffered brain damage and can't walk, talk or swallow. He lives in a nursing home and eats and breathes through tubes.

Police Sgt. Andrea Eichhorn alleges the boy's family left a puddle of water on the floor, causing her fall during the rescue effort. She broke her knee and missed two months of work.

Eichhorn's attorney, David Heil, said she now has persistent knee pain and will likely develop arthritis. He said city benefits paid by workers' compensation and some disability checks helped with medical bills, but it wasn't enough.

"It's a situation where the Cosmillos have caused these problems, brought them on themselves, then tried to play the victim," Heil said.

The lawsuit seeks unspecified damages.

Yeah, being left with a brain-damaged child sure sounds like playing the victim to me.

It has since been reported that the cop has been put on leave of absence and the lawsuit has been withdrawn. However, Mr. Heil's website remains up and running, complete with his proud display that he has been "certified" by the Florida Bar.

That tells ME everything I need to know.

----

Cardiac surgeons.  When a California cardiologist's patient got a little testy with his doctor during an angioplasty procedure, he called in three unusual specialists to assist:

 Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine,  Dr. Howard.

During the Aug. 24 procedure, the physician made “chopping like blows to the patient's abdomen,” tried to hit his leg “with a substantial amount of force” and “used the tip of his elbow to hit (him) on the forehead,” three witnesses told investigators.

After the patient was moved to a gurney when the angioplasty was finished, the physician told him, “You are an animal” and then “grabbed and twisted the patient's nose,” making it turn “bluish,” the witnesses said.

The physician's admitting privileges were suspended, with three members of the hospital's governing board announcing their decision in the following statement:

"Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye,....
Goodbye!"

----

I don't even have time for the nuns fighting among themselves in Italy, the Florida prosecutor arrested for arranging sex with a five-year old, or anything whatsoever about the Bush administration. Only so many hours in the day, yknow.

Comments

[headbanger118.livejournal.com]

Judas Priest. That's all I can really say that's fit to print.