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Apparently the alphabetical Weather Channel winter storm names are all the way down to Uri.
In Soviet Russia, snow plows YOU!
Oddly, this turned out to be far more of a problem in Texas, where the Schadenfreude Squad has been all over Rafael Cruz today. After the sudden arrival of snow, cold and ice that knocked out much of the Lone Star power grid- determinedly kept off the federal power grid to avoid that Burdensome Gummint Regulation- the oil capital of the universe can't keep up with its own power needs. So poor ol' Lyin' Ted has been seeing multiple reminders today of how mean he was to California when it had its wildfire-related power outages last year:
Meanwhile. Texas Guv Greg Abbott actually sucked it up and called the President requesting a disaster declaration. Unlike the previous Resident who just said his own mean things when California came a-callin' last year, Joe promptly proved that he is governing for all the United States and approved the disaster relief. I do hope, though, that he got a little mocking in first:
Chief of Staff: Mr. President, the Governor of Texas is on the phone.
Joe: Heyyyyyyy Abbbbbbotttttttttt!
Guv: I hate that guy!
----
The prediction for days was that Uri was going to wreak havoc on us as well, starting last night and building to a crescendo of snow by the foot by late this morning. This proved to be the usual overstatement. By the time I left for work this morning, they'd gotten a whopping 5.9 inches at the airport (which is stupid because I don't know anyone who lives at the airport). There was maybe half that on the unofficial gauge on top of our outdoor lamppost.
After yet another of these false alarms, I proposed taking the Weather Channel nomenclature one step further and retroactively name Petered Out Winter Storms That Didn't Live Up To The Hype. They can release the list in advance. Winter Storm New Coke. Winter Storm Buffalo Sabres. Winter Storm Impeachment Trial. I asked for other suggestions. I got some:
Winter Storm Arch Deluxe.
Winter Storm Segway.
Winter Storm Google Plus.
Winter Storm That Lone Ranger Movie With Johnny Depp in it. Winter Storm Any Pirates of the Carribean Movie Other Than The First One. Winter Storm Honestly Most Movies Starring Johnny Depp In The Last Couple Years.
Nominations are still open until I set about alphabetizing them.
----
Despite its relative piffleness, Uri had still put down enough of the stuff to require some shoveling and even snowblowing. We have a service that plows the driveway, and which had done so by the time I headed out with the dog this morning, but we're still responsible for the sidewalk and the walkway and steps leading up to our front door. I will knock the latter off in the morning, but did not have to deal with the sidewalk: our neighbor Laura was out snowblowing her sidewalk- and did ours before I even got out to the curb. I thanked her for the kindness. We've never become BFFs with them over there, but random acts do not require that. In fact, sometimes it makes them kinder. And I’ve got the perfect plan to repay her: when I do get out to shovel our own walkway to the front door and the steps, if I see that the town came by and resplatted their driveway, I’ll dig it out for them.
The other nice thing about it was I got to see their golden retriever out in their yard while her mommy was snowblowing. She's pushing 12 years old and doesn't get around much, but she really is the sweetest thing. Across the street from them on the other side, another guy was snowblowing with their fairly new chocolate lab puppy just GALLIVANTING in the freshly fallen white stuff. They seem so happy out in it, but it did get me wondering: if we tamed wolves 40,000 years ago and their domesticated descendants have been living with us ever since, why is it we could teach them to sit and stay but not shovel?
Maybe Uri knows.
In Soviet Russia, snow plows YOU!
Oddly, this turned out to be far more of a problem in Texas, where the Schadenfreude Squad has been all over Rafael Cruz today. After the sudden arrival of snow, cold and ice that knocked out much of the Lone Star power grid- determinedly kept off the federal power grid to avoid that Burdensome Gummint Regulation- the oil capital of the universe can't keep up with its own power needs. So poor ol' Lyin' Ted has been seeing multiple reminders today of how mean he was to California when it had its wildfire-related power outages last year:
Meanwhile. Texas Guv Greg Abbott actually sucked it up and called the President requesting a disaster declaration. Unlike the previous Resident who just said his own mean things when California came a-callin' last year, Joe promptly proved that he is governing for all the United States and approved the disaster relief. I do hope, though, that he got a little mocking in first:
Chief of Staff: Mr. President, the Governor of Texas is on the phone.
Joe: Heyyyyyyy Abbbbbbotttttttttt!
Guv: I hate that guy!
----
The prediction for days was that Uri was going to wreak havoc on us as well, starting last night and building to a crescendo of snow by the foot by late this morning. This proved to be the usual overstatement. By the time I left for work this morning, they'd gotten a whopping 5.9 inches at the airport (which is stupid because I don't know anyone who lives at the airport). There was maybe half that on the unofficial gauge on top of our outdoor lamppost.
After yet another of these false alarms, I proposed taking the Weather Channel nomenclature one step further and retroactively name Petered Out Winter Storms That Didn't Live Up To The Hype. They can release the list in advance. Winter Storm New Coke. Winter Storm Buffalo Sabres. Winter Storm Impeachment Trial. I asked for other suggestions. I got some:
Winter Storm Arch Deluxe.
Winter Storm Segway.
Winter Storm Google Plus.
Winter Storm That Lone Ranger Movie With Johnny Depp in it. Winter Storm Any Pirates of the Carribean Movie Other Than The First One. Winter Storm Honestly Most Movies Starring Johnny Depp In The Last Couple Years.
Nominations are still open until I set about alphabetizing them.
----
Despite its relative piffleness, Uri had still put down enough of the stuff to require some shoveling and even snowblowing. We have a service that plows the driveway, and which had done so by the time I headed out with the dog this morning, but we're still responsible for the sidewalk and the walkway and steps leading up to our front door. I will knock the latter off in the morning, but did not have to deal with the sidewalk: our neighbor Laura was out snowblowing her sidewalk- and did ours before I even got out to the curb. I thanked her for the kindness. We've never become BFFs with them over there, but random acts do not require that. In fact, sometimes it makes them kinder. And I’ve got the perfect plan to repay her: when I do get out to shovel our own walkway to the front door and the steps, if I see that the town came by and resplatted their driveway, I’ll dig it out for them.
The other nice thing about it was I got to see their golden retriever out in their yard while her mommy was snowblowing. She's pushing 12 years old and doesn't get around much, but she really is the sweetest thing. Across the street from them on the other side, another guy was snowblowing with their fairly new chocolate lab puppy just GALLIVANTING in the freshly fallen white stuff. They seem so happy out in it, but it did get me wondering: if we tamed wolves 40,000 years ago and their domesticated descendants have been living with us ever since, why is it we could teach them to sit and stay but not shovel?
Maybe Uri knows.