♫Can't live withem, you can't live without'em, there's something wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey about'em♫

Clients, that is.  Here, heavily redacted, is the gist of a chat just now with one of them.

C: I want to get a loan to buy such-and-such, but the bank says I have a bankruptcy on my credit report.

Me: That's right. You filed one, in 2004. (Actually, you filed two- one in 2001 that I took over and got driv crazy with, then the one in '04 that's still showing up, the one someone else filed and in which you discharged my bill, but I'm nice and stupid that way, representing you again.)

C: How long will it be on my report?

Me: Ten years. Although nothing requires a bank to count it against you for that whole time. It's whatever their own policies state. Could be all ten years, could be two.

C: Well, the banker said something about seven years.

Me: Right, that's how long other things stay on there, but they can choose to ignore it sooner.  If the banker said seven years, that would be this September.

C: So, is there any way you could make that go faster?

Me (aloud): Erm, no.

Me (thinking): Short of getting in the TARDIS and moving things up four months? Dammit, I'm a lawyer, not a Doctor.

And everybody repeat how much we all love our jobs....