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I should preface this first part by confirming something that's probably obvious: I don't get out much. Not in particularly big groups of out, anyway. I work alone, usually deal with one or two clients at a time, and on even a busy day in court, I might be surrounded by, at most, a dozen people I know and maybe a dozen or two more that I don't know, and rarely for more than an hour or two at a time.
Yesterday, though? I spent close to eight hours in the constant company of something like 200 people, representing probably 90 percent of the colleagues, opponents and judges I have spent the last 20 years of my career with. All at once.
So last night, once the curriculum passed out of my active consciousness, all those subliminal shapshots of All Those People came back to me in dreams. No one of them was weird enough for a report, but the quantity more than made up for any lack of quality weirdness. Needless to say, I didn't sleep all that much, or all that well.
----
One final oddity from the "facilities" part of the program: Genesee Community College, the host of our program, has apparently chosen the cougar as its sports mascot. I'm not sure what they were thinking, since the natural habitat of the animal is nowhere near here (although there have apparently been some mountain lion sightings not too far to our south). If they're being metaphorical, only one thing comes to mind, and that was made even more obvious by their passing out bottles of the college's trademarked brand of bottled H2O to guzzle at our lunch and breaks:
Cougar Water.
At a program that had more than a few single 40-to-50-something women in the same room as a bunch of up-and-coming 20-ish male associates, I suspect I wasn't the only one finding this to be a rather odd choice.
----
Ah, and then there was actual learning. Main thing I learned is, God my job is boring, and almost as scary.
We learned new ways to screw up old things. We discovered there's something called a "Schwab button" and why we should not use it. During the last panel (intended for last as a "summary of recent cases" just to be able to cut things off at the exact dismissal time by stopping the program during the last "recent case" when the bell rings), the speaker actually offered up a citation for the "triangular setoff groupies in the room." Sorry, but that is not nearly as kinky as it sounds.
Right before that, after much cat-herding, we were all brought together for the compulsory ethics portion of the program, where we were told that we are now ethically obligated to rat on our clients and colleagues, unless the guilty conduct in question occurred before April 1, 2009, in which case we are prohibited from ratting on them. Running from a courtroom before actually witnessing unethical conduct was also advocated. Yes, this is why all those jokes are true.
Just one more seminar before my birthday and I'll have my credits all-in. And THAT one, I'm helping run. Wonder how much it would cost to order up a bunch of "TARDIS Water" labels so we can knock the whole thing off in a few minutes?
Yesterday, though? I spent close to eight hours in the constant company of something like 200 people, representing probably 90 percent of the colleagues, opponents and judges I have spent the last 20 years of my career with. All at once.
So last night, once the curriculum passed out of my active consciousness, all those subliminal shapshots of All Those People came back to me in dreams. No one of them was weird enough for a report, but the quantity more than made up for any lack of quality weirdness. Needless to say, I didn't sleep all that much, or all that well.
----
One final oddity from the "facilities" part of the program: Genesee Community College, the host of our program, has apparently chosen the cougar as its sports mascot. I'm not sure what they were thinking, since the natural habitat of the animal is nowhere near here (although there have apparently been some mountain lion sightings not too far to our south). If they're being metaphorical, only one thing comes to mind, and that was made even more obvious by their passing out bottles of the college's trademarked brand of bottled H2O to guzzle at our lunch and breaks:
Cougar Water.
At a program that had more than a few single 40-to-50-something women in the same room as a bunch of up-and-coming 20-ish male associates, I suspect I wasn't the only one finding this to be a rather odd choice.
----
Ah, and then there was actual learning. Main thing I learned is, God my job is boring, and almost as scary.
We learned new ways to screw up old things. We discovered there's something called a "Schwab button" and why we should not use it. During the last panel (intended for last as a "summary of recent cases" just to be able to cut things off at the exact dismissal time by stopping the program during the last "recent case" when the bell rings), the speaker actually offered up a citation for the "triangular setoff groupies in the room." Sorry, but that is not nearly as kinky as it sounds.
Right before that, after much cat-herding, we were all brought together for the compulsory ethics portion of the program, where we were told that we are now ethically obligated to rat on our clients and colleagues, unless the guilty conduct in question occurred before April 1, 2009, in which case we are prohibited from ratting on them. Running from a courtroom before actually witnessing unethical conduct was also advocated. Yes, this is why all those jokes are true.
Just one more seminar before my birthday and I'll have my credits all-in. And THAT one, I'm helping run. Wonder how much it would cost to order up a bunch of "TARDIS Water" labels so we can knock the whole thing off in a few minutes?
