Blame Canada

I know, I promised. No more baseball.

This isn't baseball.  It's one of the plagues of Exodus:



Em was with friends last night, so we went out to dinner, then returned just in time to see the baseball field in Cleveland being invaded by thousands of dancing bugs. Midges, some called them; however, the apparently correct entomological etymology is Canadian soldiers, who picked last night and that field to conduct their mating-ritual Dance of Joy.

Hey, now. Does anyone deserve a Canadian plague more than Yankees?

Solving the Problems of the World Department. Line Forms to the Left.

Our usually staid contest for County Clerk just got interesting, thanks to an oddly timed policy decision by our governor.

Elliott wants to allow illegal aliens to get drivers licenses. There are legitimate policy reasons for allowing it (increased accountability, greater access to auto insurance), but his opponents are screaming back about the equally legitimate policy reasons AGAINST it (legitimizing illegals and giving terrorists greater access to credit and transportation).

The county clerks of this state, who are subagents of the Department of Motor Vehicles for purposes of issuing the documents, passed a resolution this week opposing this policy shift. Standing out among them, though, was our own clerk, Kathy Hochul, who Elliott appointed to the post earlier this year after he tapped her longtime boss to be in charge of the statewide DMV.

She abstained, and in my mind, that's an even worse thing to do than taking a stand on it. Especially because in her house, at least, she should have reason to take a stand: I don't know Kathy personally, but I do know her husband Bill, who was in my law school graduating class and is the Special U.S. Attorney in charge of fighting terrorism in these parts.

Kathy's opponent, a longtime Amherst Republican hack trying to pitch himself as an outsider, has already seized on the issue, and frankly, I don't blame him.

Fortunately, I have the problem solved for everybody. Elliott, get a pen and write this down.

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You wanna give illegals licenses to make them more accountable and let them get insurance?  Fine with me. Just do with them what you do with a similar group of individuals entitled to some, but not all, of the rights and privileges of full adult citizens: issue their licenses with ILLEGAL ALIEN in prominent red ink the way you put UNDER 21 on the licenses of the younguns.  Or, you could do what many states do and print their licenses vertically (that way the under-21 illegals won't be blinded by all the redness on the document).

If they achieve legality, instead of turning in a blue card for full privileges, they'd turn in a green card.

It's simple, practical, and it'll never happen. But when I have to see Bill Fucking O'Laughlin's name on my deed and index number receipts for the next four years because of this, don't say I didn't give you the idea.