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I did not go out into the madness and buy a PS3 yesterday. Not to play, not to gift, not even to fund my daughter's college education as, seemingly, most of the geeks in line were doing. Still, I can't let this craze pass unnoticed.
Despite the madness attached to the sale of this beast, Sony, apparently, is losing money on each sale at $600 US. This experience further proves what everyone in the computer industry already knows: the money's to be made on the back end, developing the software.
And so I present, ::drumroll:: the first new game for the new machine--
You are Nerdo the Unspeakable, master of your gaming domain. You live in a world where helpless geeks are camped out in front of stores, deprived of sleep and some holding over $600 in crumpled dollar bills and quarters, trying to buy the new hot gaming console. Your job: relieve them of their quarries.
Use your imagination. Break into the back room and steal them from the employees. Work your way down the line going into the store and steal their money. Work the happy customers coming out of the store and take the consoles at gunpoint. Start a riot among the teeming mob and pick pockets in the resulting confusion. (This feature not available in Canada, where the worst report of mob violence was of a "verbal spat" in Grand Prairie, Alberta. This being Canada, the police were called, but no arrests were made.)
Don't like committing crime in the dark and cold? Then head for your own computer, where you can hack and phish away on eBay where most of these critters are showing up. Check with sellers, who are always looking forshills enthusiastic gamers to "stoke" their prices. Get their PayPal account numbers and give them the beatdown they deserve.
When it's all over, you sit down and plug in your ill-gotten booty over by the plasma screen TV, turn it on, become enthralled with the death and jiggling on the screen- and don't notice that your new PS3 (being a Sony, after all) has a bad battery which overheats, engulfing itself, the house, and eventually you in a sea of fatal flames.
Despite the madness attached to the sale of this beast, Sony, apparently, is losing money on each sale at $600 US. This experience further proves what everyone in the computer industry already knows: the money's to be made on the back end, developing the software.
And so I present, ::drumroll:: the first new game for the new machine--
You are Nerdo the Unspeakable, master of your gaming domain. You live in a world where helpless geeks are camped out in front of stores, deprived of sleep and some holding over $600 in crumpled dollar bills and quarters, trying to buy the new hot gaming console. Your job: relieve them of their quarries.
Use your imagination. Break into the back room and steal them from the employees. Work your way down the line going into the store and steal their money. Work the happy customers coming out of the store and take the consoles at gunpoint. Start a riot among the teeming mob and pick pockets in the resulting confusion. (This feature not available in Canada, where the worst report of mob violence was of a "verbal spat" in Grand Prairie, Alberta. This being Canada, the police were called, but no arrests were made.)
Don't like committing crime in the dark and cold? Then head for your own computer, where you can hack and phish away on eBay where most of these critters are showing up. Check with sellers, who are always looking for
When it's all over, you sit down and plug in your ill-gotten booty over by the plasma screen TV, turn it on, become enthralled with the death and jiggling on the screen- and don't notice that your new PS3 (being a Sony, after all) has a bad battery which overheats, engulfing itself, the house, and eventually you in a sea of fatal flames.