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Getting into Bad Habits;)
Mar. 2nd, 2016 04:44 pmMy day began at Tim Horton's. The drive-thru line was impossible, so I went in to order and sit down for once.
As I scanned a leftover morning paper, I saw her: a Bride of Christ. You could tell by the huge cross around her neck, her standard-issue nun shoes, and her scrape-the-paint-off demeanor. And Sister was on the move.
You've heard of manspreading? Well, I have now experienced nunspreading. In her right hand was her cane- one of the claw-footed "quad" jobs that could take out an entire batallion of Imperial stormtroopers-
- but Nuns on the Run need more storage space, so her other hand was guiding one of Timmy's wood-over-metal-legged dining room chairs, holding her purse, her other bag, and whatever else nuns need to have on hand at all times....
And she was heading for the ladies' room.
With a voice that could (and probably once did) silence an entire parochial school, Sister was a combination of seeking and refusing help. No, she didn't want help steadying herself, but could you steady the bottom of the cane (and the chair, no small feat) on the winter floor mat? Could you possibly hold the door? (No, not THAT one, you sinful peeper!) And everyone who helped- and we all did when we weren't busting our guts laughing at the sight of the thing- got cheerful (for her) replies of "Thank you! And God Bless!" as she finally went into the closest Timmy comes to a confessional.
They're still running their Roll Up The Rim promotion, and I figured that after that, today of all days would be the one when I'd win something more substantial than a free donut.
Aw hell no:
Oh well. I guess it's like caddying for the Dalai Lama- no tip, but I've probably avoided an eternity in purgatory, so I've got that going for me, which is nice.
As I scanned a leftover morning paper, I saw her: a Bride of Christ. You could tell by the huge cross around her neck, her standard-issue nun shoes, and her scrape-the-paint-off demeanor. And Sister was on the move.
You've heard of manspreading? Well, I have now experienced nunspreading. In her right hand was her cane- one of the claw-footed "quad" jobs that could take out an entire batallion of Imperial stormtroopers-
- but Nuns on the Run need more storage space, so her other hand was guiding one of Timmy's wood-over-metal-legged dining room chairs, holding her purse, her other bag, and whatever else nuns need to have on hand at all times....
And she was heading for the ladies' room.
With a voice that could (and probably once did) silence an entire parochial school, Sister was a combination of seeking and refusing help. No, she didn't want help steadying herself, but could you steady the bottom of the cane (and the chair, no small feat) on the winter floor mat? Could you possibly hold the door? (No, not THAT one, you sinful peeper!) And everyone who helped- and we all did when we weren't busting our guts laughing at the sight of the thing- got cheerful (for her) replies of "Thank you! And God Bless!" as she finally went into the closest Timmy comes to a confessional.
They're still running their Roll Up The Rim promotion, and I figured that after that, today of all days would be the one when I'd win something more substantial than a free donut.
Aw hell no:
Oh well. I guess it's like caddying for the Dalai Lama- no tip, but I've probably avoided an eternity in purgatory, so I've got that going for me, which is nice.