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It can't be easy being an ambulance chaser lawyer. The shameless pursuit of anyone and everyone who might be responsible for injuries. The endless sucking-up to judges and jurors. All that pancake makeup you have to wear in the TV ads, and the strain on the eyes and vocal cords from blowing by those pesky ethics-laws disclaimers at subhuman typesize and superhuman voice speed.
The leading firm in the local clubhouse has been a staple of local courthouse hallways for decades. They've had various names over that time as one name partner blinked off and on due to ethical violations, but they've always taken advantage of every marketing opportunity there is. Radio and TV ads and billboards are in heavy rotation 24/7 everywhere in 716, 585 and beyond; and they continue to run cover-ad and full double-page spreads in Yellow Pages even though most of the under-50 world hasn't cracked one open since the Clinton Administration.
They were recently sued by one of their former lawyers over what he alleged to be, and the court agreed was, an oppressive employment agreement they made him sign. In it, they alleged that the firm devotes more than 43 percent of all of its overhead- including payroll (other than attorney bonuses), office expense, insurance and everything else- to all of these "case acquisition" costs. In comparison? My entire advertising budget for 2011 was just over 7 percent of my total deductible expenses, and that includes no payroll and no medical insurance (that comes off elsewhere for my own) .
And yet there's trouble in Injury City. Despite all their efforts, it would appear that they are losing out to up-and-coming competitors. Not because the n00bs are necessarily better, or bigger, or more experienced, and certainly not because they're spending more on advertising. No, if there's one thing that's worrying them, it's the reduction of the intelligence of the ideal P.I. client to a single digit.
You see, they've got competition from a solo, who has come up with a catchier slogan and, most important, a catchy phone number. Hurt in a car? Call [his name goes thar.] 444-4444. Not to be outdone, another team of trawlers, who'd been specializing in suing on behalf of victims of DWIs, expanded their campaign to one saying WE SUE DRUNK DRIVERS. WE SUE TEXTING DRIVERS. WE SUE DISTRACTED DRIVERS. 222-2222. (And they multitask these three messages by putting them on a rotating billboard at one of the most dangerous expressway intersections of all of Buffalo, creating the very type of distraction they supposedly sue for.)
This morning, on the way to court, I heard my first new ad, and saw the first new billboard, for the ultimate dumbdown of the message. Never mind qualifications, testimonials, results. If the cell key sticks, you get paid quick! Or, rather, the actual catchy new slogan:
DON'T WAIT. CALL 8.
So yes, 888-8888, at least in this area code, will get you two of the shiniestdomes minds of the local legal profession. I presume they'll eventually sell off the old one (which ends in 2020) to some kind of optical practice, so don't be surprised if eventually you start to see Snellen charts looking like this:
Not attorney advertising.
The leading firm in the local clubhouse has been a staple of local courthouse hallways for decades. They've had various names over that time as one name partner blinked off and on due to ethical violations, but they've always taken advantage of every marketing opportunity there is. Radio and TV ads and billboards are in heavy rotation 24/7 everywhere in 716, 585 and beyond; and they continue to run cover-ad and full double-page spreads in Yellow Pages even though most of the under-50 world hasn't cracked one open since the Clinton Administration.
They were recently sued by one of their former lawyers over what he alleged to be, and the court agreed was, an oppressive employment agreement they made him sign. In it, they alleged that the firm devotes more than 43 percent of all of its overhead- including payroll (other than attorney bonuses), office expense, insurance and everything else- to all of these "case acquisition" costs. In comparison? My entire advertising budget for 2011 was just over 7 percent of my total deductible expenses, and that includes no payroll and no medical insurance (that comes off elsewhere for my own) .
And yet there's trouble in Injury City. Despite all their efforts, it would appear that they are losing out to up-and-coming competitors. Not because the n00bs are necessarily better, or bigger, or more experienced, and certainly not because they're spending more on advertising. No, if there's one thing that's worrying them, it's the reduction of the intelligence of the ideal P.I. client to a single digit.
You see, they've got competition from a solo, who has come up with a catchier slogan and, most important, a catchy phone number. Hurt in a car? Call [his name goes thar.] 444-4444. Not to be outdone, another team of trawlers, who'd been specializing in suing on behalf of victims of DWIs, expanded their campaign to one saying WE SUE DRUNK DRIVERS. WE SUE TEXTING DRIVERS. WE SUE DISTRACTED DRIVERS. 222-2222. (And they multitask these three messages by putting them on a rotating billboard at one of the most dangerous expressway intersections of all of Buffalo, creating the very type of distraction they supposedly sue for.)
This morning, on the way to court, I heard my first new ad, and saw the first new billboard, for the ultimate dumbdown of the message. Never mind qualifications, testimonials, results. If the cell key sticks, you get paid quick! Or, rather, the actual catchy new slogan:
DON'T WAIT. CALL 8.
So yes, 888-8888, at least in this area code, will get you two of the shiniest
Not attorney advertising.