"Because it feels so good when I stop."

What is, Why are you banging your head against the wall doing real estate?

Yep- I'm in Final Jeopardy again.  Any time I touch one of these deals, the only real estate law that applies is Murphy's.  Years ago, I came back from a failed closing in such a bad mood, I tossed my briefcase at a potted plant.  I should know not to. I have qualified friends who can do them. Yet I can do them. I'm good at them. I just attract difficulties like hydrogen atoms attract each other. As in inside H-bombs.

This one's a short sale. Everyone agrees on the figures, including the bank getting the net money.  I turned in most of my stuff weeks ago. Last Tuesday, I finally got the "curatives"- what the title examiner needed to close.

He needed a lot. And I got it all to them by Thursday, or at least worked out how to deal with the things.  But they needed more. And kept needing more so it didn't close on Friday.

That made a difference, since there are unpaid property taxes involved, and those have monthly payoffs, not daily ones. Which means hundreds of extra bucks nobody has if we go into June. But wait! Since the 31st is a Sunday, the town will take the May figure today- but only in person.  So I came back to Rochester late this morning, worked through all the final arrangements (including a ridiculous and meaningless corporate state form that you must file but you cannot obtain without jumping through hoops), and we closed at the other lawyer's office over two hours ago. I've been sitting in the town library next to the town hall in question since 3, waiting for the call that it's gone on record and I can disburse....

and got a call, all right. From the seventh circle of hell.

The county rejected one of the ancillary recording forms as obsolete.  It's a routine recording document I've had, in fillable .pdf format, on my computer since 2007, and used as recently as my last closing last year. They won't take it. It barcodes the fillins and if ANY of them is imperfect, you fail.  Never mind that everyone else in the deal saw I was using the 2007 form, and nobody else noticed, either.

It's being redone as we speak, hopefully in time to get it done so I can pay this stupid thing and go home.

I am putting a contract out on myself. A contingent one, though. Rocco "The Realtor" Rococo has my permission to whack me if I ever even think of doing this again.

ETA. Done. Got it recorded at 4:59 p.m. Four minutes earlier, with everyone's permission, I paid the taxes. Any closer shave and I'd have the head of a cueball. Happy, but still too old for this shiz.